"Let Me Carry You"

One day I remember feeling particularly down. I was struggling to complete some goals I had set for myself, and this led to feelings of being a failure. When the time came to exercise, I didn’t want to; however, getting a clear feeling like I should just do it anyway, I reluctantly got changed and began my exercise (which usually is playing a rhythm game in VR).

While playing, the memories of all the times I’ve been rejected, thought little of, viewed as hopeless, or simply looked down on (often times by my own self) kept looping in my mind. As my anger and frustration grew, I found myself giving into the emotion, and letting it push me to exercise harder. I admit it felt good, especially to see how it did seem to make me better in the game.

After a while I kept feeling like something was off, and realized that I had turned to my anger and kept it alive by continually feeding it those horrible thoughts. Deep down I knew that Jesus Christ wouldn’t want anger to carry me through my pain. That’s when I got this feeling that was simply, “Let ME carry you”. My anger slowly faded as I focused on that phrase, and peace began to grow. I knew I wasn’t a failure. I was just learning and growing. Most of all, I knew that Jesus Christ was with me.

Was getting my anger and frustrations out like that a bad thing? Honestly I don’t know, but regardless I believe Jesus Christ had a more important lesson to teach me, and that was to not let anger carry me, but Him.